This Friday, I leave for my next filmmaking adventure. I have been cast as the lead role in a full-length Independent Christian film called "The Senior Prank"! It has an anti-bullying message and will be shot in Virginia. The funny part is that I will be playing a character that is 9 years younger than myself! Haha! It's about time that I was able to capitalize on my young looks and get paid for it! :-)
Pray for me when you think about it. I'm still exhausted from more than two months of sleep deprivation, and this next shoot is going to be very intense. We will be filming 12 hours a day (at least), 6 days a week, for three weeks. I finally broke down and bought some all-natural sleeping aids that will hopefully help me to get some good sleep so I can survive (especially when I have to sleep during the day, which is something I'm not normally able to do).
I am so tired and overwhelmed right now. I have lots of lines to memorize, I need to spend time actually developing my character and finding her motivations, I have some online acting workshops I want to watch, I have to pack clothes for myself and to wear in the movie (but I don't know yet what they want me to bring to wear in the movie), and there always seems to be so many other things going on at home.
The wardrobe thing has really caused me the most stress, I think. I have never dressed like a typical high school student, so I don't already have lots of clothes that would work in the movie. I'm going up a few days early, so I might have to go shopping with the wardrobe supervisor on Saturday in hopes of finding clothes that will work for me. I'm so hard to shop for! I was looking through the clothes in Walmart today, and the smallest ladies' size (4) was too big. I found some girls' capris size 3 that fit, but no jeans that I was comfortable in. The ones that fit were way too tight all around for my comfort.
I have tried to choose faith and joy over stress and anxiety, but it gets especially hard when I'm this tired. I'm going to start taking those sleeping tablets tonight and hopefully will wake much more refreshed in the morning! I still can't believe tomorrow is my last day at home.
God is so good, and I can't believe He gave me this job. I need to change my attitude and choose to be excited and grateful instead of overwhelmed and scared. It is such an incredible opportunity! First of all, I get to play the lead role in a feature film, which is every actress's dream! I just wish I had more experience in front of a camera so I wouldn't feel quite so daunted. Secondly, I have at least three good friends on the crew, so it will be fun and reassuring to have them there! Thirdly, the cast seems like a really fun bunch to work with, and one of my friends, Josh Murray (an outstanding actor!) will be in the film. Also, I will be playing opposite Ben Davies, the youngest of the four main officers from "Courageous"! That's pretty cool. :-)
So yes, I have a lot to be grateful for. If I can just get through these next few days, I'm hoping that things will fall into place and that I will enjoy the process and not be terribly nervous every day. I really, really hope I can do a good job with the character (and remember all my lines!). I have to keep reminding myself that God gave me this part, and He can enable me to do a good job with it. The whole reason I am in the film business and the whole reason this film is being made is to serve and glorify HIM. And if He wants this story to be told well, I'm sure He won't let us do mediocre jobs with the acting. He's the one that gave us the talent in the first place, and He is in full control of that talent. I just need to trust in Him, submit myself to Him, and call on Him every day.
Well, I only intended to give you a short update, but I guess I had a lot of thoughts that needed processing. Thank you for bearing with me. :-) In light of the busy schedule I will be leading for the next three weeks, you probably won't hear from me. But who knows? I may surprise you with little updates here and there. I need to make use of the blogging app on my iPhone. Maybe I can post some pictures from set. :-)
Okay, I'm off to get some work done before I go to bed and hopefully get a solid eight hours of sleep (which has only happened once in the past 9 or 10 weeks). I'll leave you with a print I put together from a picture I took in Michigan. It is a good reminder to me right now...
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